Blogger.com...your stocks are down

Has anyone ever actually read or understood an error message? Me either...but I'm getting one when I try to post a comment but great comments cannot wait for a tech guy so here is my response to Simple's post...


I loved it in the Soprano's when Junior fell down the stairs and then faked the crazies to get out of a jail sentence...classic move. Also, I wonder if this fella is into dating? We don't need match.com to tell us that this guy and that Jersey trash going for the fattest woman in the world record are a match made in heaven.
http://www.thaindian.com/newsportal/health/woman-aims-to-be-worlds-fattest-eats-mounds-of-food_100334829.html

George "The Garbage Disposal" Jolicoeur

APRIL 1--Meet George Jolicoeur. The 600-pound Florida man copped yesterday to criminal charges of stealing food from restaurants and convenience stores. The bedridden Jolicoeur was not in a Seminole County courtroom when his lawyer entered a no contest plea on the 38-year-old's behalf to five misdemeanor petty theft counts. The plea deal spared the 5' 11" Jolicoeur--who breathes with the aid of a respirator--a jail term, though he was ordered to pay court costs and restitution. According to investigators, Jolicoeur would con businesses out of food or refunds by claiming that his grub was spoiled, adulterated, or inedible (Jolicoeur's ruse dates back several years and resulted in a prior no contest plea to theft charges)


This may have been one of the best scams of all time. I mean who is going to question a 5'11" 600 pound behemoth when he says some food was no good. The guy clearly knows his food. That would be like questioning Tom Brady about his taste in women or Peyton Manning about how to blame your teammates when you mess up. When your the best at something, and clearly our boy Georgie knows how to put fast food down, there is just no room for people to question you.

You may ask, well didn't they get suspicious when he would eat almost a full pizza and then tell them the cheese was spoiled? But let me remind you... the guy is 600 friggin pounds. His stomach is probably not the most discerning thing and the people at the pizza parlor are probably just happy Gorilla George didn't take off their finger when they brought him over his pie.

Anyway, I just want to give George his due. It's not that often we are in the presence of true professionals. This guy has been pulling off a brilliantly executed scam for years and laughing at all of us chumps who actually pay for our food. As a side note, you know you are in the big leagues when a guy gets out of another jail sentence with the old respirator in the court room gag. That's a real throwback move. Clearly George was paying attention in con school and really worked on refining his fundamentals over the year.

I wonder....

This is a new Friday tradition that I'm starting...called I wonder...feel free to chime-in with what you've been pondering...

- I wonder if Butler and Duke will cause a white-boy revelution in basketball....

- I wonder if you carry an UNloaded gun into airport security...is that cool?

- I wonder if you mix Al Skinner and Mick Jagger... would you get Eric Williams?

- I wonder how Shelley Smith got a job with ESPN?

- I wonder how Craig Seger got a job with TNT?

- Lost...don't know where to start

Tough Time to be a Mangina

CLEVELAND -- Cleveland Browns nose tackle Shaun Rogers remains in jail after being arrested for trying to carry a loaded gun onto a plane. Rogers was arrested Thursday at Hopkins International Airport. A .45-caliber handgun was spotted in his luggage while he was going through a security checkpoint. Police said Friday that Rogers has not yet been charged. He was booked for carrying a concealed weapon, a third-degree felony that carries a penalty of probation to five years in prison. Rogers likely faces disciplinary action from the NFL under its personal-conduct policy for players. A three-time Pro Bowl selection, the 31-year-old Rogers has played two seasons with the Browns. Cleveland acquired him from Detroit in a 2008 trade.

First of all, lets not judge Shaun Rogers here. I can't tell you how many times I've forgotten to take my belt off when I walk through the metal detector at the airport and every time there is this HUGE over-reaction. Those airport people are ready to taser the crap out of you if you mess up so I feel Shaun Roger's pain here. I'm sure he had originally planned to check his gat and forgot to take it out of his pocket...honest mistake, right? Or maybe he was flying one of those airlines that make you pay like $200 to check a bag...screw that. I mean who is the real criminal here? Having said that I doubt the judge will show Shaun any mercy (see plaxico burress)....so how much does it suck to be a Browns fan? First the team moves to Baltimore and wins a superbowl, they counter by drafting Tim Couch, Brady Quinn, and several other failures, Crennell gets canned and they bring in a proven loser in Mangini, Braylon Edwards can't catch, kills my fantasy team, and gets moved to New York (where he catches two tds in his first game), the fans wear paper bags to games, and then this Shaun Rogers business. The Browns have become the Bengals 2.0 - upgrade in arrests....downgrade in wins. It's not all bad in Cleveland though....they always have Lebron....

Guam in Danger of Tipping Over?

I know these links suck...but I don't know how to embed videos so deal with it for now...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNZczIgVXjg&feature=player_embedded#


Perhaps the most important lesson a father can teach a son is that it is better to be quiet and have people think your stupid, then to open your mouth and remove all doubt. Well apparently Old Hank never got this memo or somehow forgot (more likely as he was elected to the House at some point). I'm not going to lie, I had no idea who Hank Johnson was before I saw this video but a little Wikipedia research tells me he is a state rep from Atlanta. I watch a lot of Gangland so I know Atlanta has been a drug crazed hell hole ever since Willy Sherman burned it to the ground, but now I know why. I'm not sure when Hank fell off the wagon but it was like he saw Robert Byrd's senile and raised him some insanity. The video really speaks for itself - my only question is when will Coor's Light start using these sound bites for commercials? I can see it now...


Coors Light guy: "Hey Hank, what are the dimensions of a Coor's Light can?"
Hank: "About twelve....twelve....ahhh...."
Coor's Light guy: "Ounces?"
Hank: "Well you know a lot of people don't want to think about that..."
Coors Light Guy: "Ok...well do you like the wide mouth"
Hank: "7....7....12...7...ahhh....my fear is that it will tip over and capsize."

The Mouth Finally Canned

Their are a lot of people in the world that can never experience the sensation of closing their mouths (Tiger Woods, Victor Page and Pau Gasol to name a few). It seems all people that never close their mouths are annoying (ok maybe I liked Victor) but none have bothered me as consistently as Al Skinner. I've been calling for this guys head ever since he sucked the life out of BC basketball ten years ago by packing it in...on offense. I wonder how many fast break points the Eagles had since Skinner has been at the helm? 800? That's about 80 a year...about 2 or so a game.... Sounds about right... My guess is that Kentucky probably had more THIS YEAR. And Skinner's lazy, boring offense matched his recruiting style. The guy (more likely his assistants who clearly left fo greener pastures) brought in some diamonds in the rough in the past. He had Dudley, Craig Smith, and Troy Bell and had some good runs as a result. But apparently Al didn't get the memo that a strong recruiting program translates into better talent and more wins because he decided to take an entire year off. Seriously, go check the roster. The Eagles have ONE frehsman on the roster this year....and he wasn't even added until December. Has there ever been another program to accomplish this feat? And yet, it took BC the enitre year to can this guy...and people seem shocked...pretty unbelievable stuff.

Let's see what Big Al has done the last two years. He got blown out at home by Harvard....basically Jeremy Lin and a bunch of D-3 level talent. BC got blown-out because they were ridiculously flat and Big Al was too stubborn to press a team with no ball handlers...I've never seen something like it. That is until the same thing happened this year...to the same team minus Tyrese Rice (because Al decided not to recruit for a year). So that's why I'm thankful he is gone. As for the next coach, I'm hoping BC brings in a guy with the sleaziness and style of Caliparri because last time I checked BC ain't Duke....they're not getting any McDonald's guys unless they're paying so its time to leave our morality at the door and start pulling some strings.

Simple Jack's Survivor Analysis

I feel your pain in the bathroom, but can we get into a real debate here? The topic is Survivor and we got a duel brewing that could to the Teens what Bird v. Magic was for the 80s. Since Tom, who basically played the role of 80s Dr. J, a little past his prime.. but still someone you never want to see on the other side of a challenge, was voted off in a suicide move by the defunct Zeroes squad, it has come down to Russel v. Boston Rob.I defy anyone to watch this season and tell me this is not the most compelling matchup on TV right now. Ovechkin / Crosby, Lebron / Kobe, no-name final 4, Bizarro Locke vs. Dead Jacob, nothing comes close right now.You've got a maniacal elf with a penchant for deceit and the CT of survivor, who while he makes very Boston kid cringe that he is representing us, just happens to crush challenges like Big Ben crushes chicks, who don't want him.Russel somehow came back from the dead last week, with a performance reminiscent of Willis Reed hobbling out onto the MSG floor to spark his team to a final victory. By tricking Tyson Russel vaulted his alliance back into the game and swung momentum back his way.But don't underestimate B-Rob. The guy has ice water running through his veins. Just like the hick from french lick, his appearance causes people to constantly underestimate the cerebral nature of his game, but its there.All I have to say is I can't wait to see how it all ends. My money is on the man from Boston, but this is going to go down as one for the ages. I already know that Coach is going to play the goat, but in doing so he is going to give someone a pivotal advantage... let's just hope its our man Rob.